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Happily Married: What’s Your Role?


God created marriage and the Bible is the instruction manual for having a successful relationship. God’s perfect plan for marriage is in Ephesians 5. When you follow this plan, your marriage will be successful.

Key Scriptures: Ephesians 5:20-33 Passion

20-21 Always give thanks to Father God for every person he brings into your life in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. And out of your reverence for Christ be supportive of each other in love.

22-24 For wives, this means being supportive to your husbands like you are tenderly devoted to our Lord, for the husband provides leadership for the wife, just as Christ provides leadership for his church, as the Savior and Reviver of the body. In the same way the church is devoted to Christ, let the wives be devoted to their husbands in everything.

25-27 And to the husbands, you are to demonstrate love for your wives with the same tender devotion that Christ demonstrated to us, his bride. For he died for us, sacrificing himself to make us holy and pure, cleansing us through the showering of the pure water of the Word of God. All that he does in us is designed to make us a mature church for his pleasure, until we become a source of praise to him—glorious and radiant, beautiful and holy, without fault or flaw.

28-30 Husbands have the obligation of loving and caring for their wives the same way they love and care for their own bodies, for to love your wife is to love your own self. No one abuses his own body, but pampers it—serving and satisfying its needs. That’s exactly what Christ does for his church! He serves and satisfies us as members of his body.

31-33 For this reason a man is to leave his father and his mother and lovingly hold to his wife, since the two have become joined as one flesh. Marriage is the beautiful design of the Almighty, a great and sacred mystery—meant to be a vivid example of Christ and his church. So every married man should be gracious to his wife just as he is gracious to himself. And every wife should be tenderly devoted to her husband.

3 Points about our roles as spouse:


(Bible References: Ephesians 5:21-24; 1 Peter 3:1-6; Ephesians 5:25-30)

A) Wife Honors Husband

  • When a wife’s behavior is respectful, she can change her husband.

  • Being submissive means, “I don’t have to disrespect or nag you. I believe God can change your heart.”

B) Husband Loves Wife & Provides Security

  • A husband can change his wife as he sacrifices and loves her.

  • A woman is sexually attracted to her husband when he is a servant, especially when he is doing housework. 


(Bible References: 1 Thessalonians 5:11; Hebrews 3:12-13; 1 Corinthians 11:7b; Proverbs 24:26; Proverbs 18:21)

A) Husband should nourish and cherish his wife. 

  • Godly character is essential for a man.

  • Men reflect the nature of God while women reflect the nature of their husband.

B) Wife should be a cheerleader & encourager.

  • A wife can say anything she wants to say, but the way she says it is critical.

  • A wife can destroy her husband’s manhood or build his priesthood.


(Bible Reference: Genesis 2:18)

A) A man will naturally meet his wife’s needs when he speaks security. 

  • In every decision you make, make it while continuing to speak security.

B) A woman will naturally meet her husband’s needs when she speaks honor to him. 


(Bible References: Acts 3:19; Colossians 3:12-14)

  • Are you fulfilling the role God has called you to as a spouse?
  • Are you speaking honor/security/love to your spouse?
  • Are you loving your spouse the way Jesus loves the church?